Serpent's Egg

The Eroticism of Fat Men

“Unrequited love is the cruellest experience inflicted by people not actually enemies. Dowson was demeaned and humiliated”

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“Unrequited love is the cruellest experience inflicted by people not actually enemies. Dowson was demeaned and humiliated, particularly as he recognised deficiencies in Adelaide—and his friends were ever ready to do so if he did not—but he still could not help but love her. If only he could do something to make himself worthy of her, he thought. If only she loved him it would be so easy to be good, to eschew the drinking and the prostitutes; but it was so hard not to plunge into the oblivion of sensation when she was so cold. All other women paled into uniform insignificance beside her and sex with one of them, far from being a betrayal of Adelaide, became a form of self-abasement. Perhaps even the love of Adelaide itself was a form of self-abasement, and he had it in his nature to love most the woman who would treat him worst. Surely, no seraphs ever envied him this love.”

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